I know I make a lot of reference to places and occasions from
South Africa, but this is like my base of knowledge and so I will use it just
to show that there are some brain cells floating in my head. And the great card
of reference taken into account now is the “Rainbow Nations’” abundant supply
of wildlife. From those pesky lions who most times refrain from wandering well-kept
backyards, to those obnoxious things commonly known as Brothers, we have them
all and many more. So considering this, I can almost count myself an expert on
the ways of the wild. But when you enter the realms of another country, you
will surely become as intelligent in this matter as our darling President Zuma
and his knowledge on matters of state.
On the vast plains of Yellowstone there are many animals
that wanderer about, causing many tourists to ooh and aah. Upon entering this
park the bets started flying around the car. Kate was going to see Yogi Bear in
his natural habitat, unfortunately she did not realise that Yogi Bear lived on
her television screen, but then again we are talking about Kate. Carmen was adamant
about seeing a wolf. I was all for seeing an Elk, I liked the sound of the word
not the way the animal looked. And Kevin? He wanted to see a deer. Obviously
living in New Jersey, where it is more common to have a deer in your backyard
then a dog, had not deterred his appreciation of this fine creature.
We had not been in the vicinity of the park for more than
five minutes when there sitting like a beast was a creature I had never before
seen. It had the most frightening head on this very out of proportion body. So
like the tourists we were and almost burning the brake pads out we came to a
stop right beside this beast. Out the cameras were whipped, as we clicked away,
being careful not to get too close. And while we were having this impromptu
photo session cars were passing by with terrible facial expressions and holding
up fingers that should have been left down, and not to mention the out of tune
honking that was going on with the cars. Maybe they had just not yet seen the
beast. I thought, when they see our awesome pictures they will feel deep regret
for their unsatisfactory display of drama. So on we drive feeling very chuffed
that we had spotted an animal so soon. Lady Luck must be taking a seat in this
car. Two minutes up the road was a long line of cars parked on the side of a
narrow road, with tourist spilling out of their cars aiming their very
expensive foreign cameras far into the distant. So we pull in behind the last
car and take our cameras out and start pointing, at what we are not quite sure
of yet. And then I spot it, another one of those beast things standing so close
by. I yell out excitedly to everyone that I had found it. I was going crazy.
And then some kind person went on to inform these naïve souls that what I had
just “found” was a Bison. By now I’m going wow, pretty neat. The name even
sounds beastly. And then the next words poured out of his mouth, “They’re as
common as cows here.” Now all I’m thinking is, I stopped to take a picture of a
cow? What levels of tragic tourist had we dropped too that I cow would make an
interesting focus for a picture?
The creature we had indeed been looking for that time was a
wolf. A man with his ultra this and mega that with a super whatever camera had
spotted it many miles away and so we had waited patiently to see it. When we
spotted what looked like a movement in the bushes over the mountain, we
determined that this was the wolf, snapped a picture of that moving bush and
then headed on our way. Carmen’s wolf had not come out into the spotlight that
time, but another opportunity would present itself. Driving around the park in
the late hours of the night, after coming back from a rodeo, we were rushing
along glad not to be travelling at 2 miles an hour. When suddenly in front of
us this insane person had not come to the conclusion that he could at least up
his speed to 5, so there with brakes leaving fire trails behind us we came to a
sudden jolting stop. And what was there right by us, sniffing the very same air
we were sniffing? A wolf. A very big and very magnificent wolf. With the full moon shining down on it, it
looked utterly unreal. And if I had not turned my head to make sure Kevin was
sitting in the drivers seat, I would have almost thought it was him standing
there in his werewolf form. The wolf did kind of strut about like Kevin, with a
theme song of “I’m sexy and I know it,” blaring in its head. So Carmen had now really
seen her wolf.
The next was Yogi Bear. After trying to inform Kate that
Yogi Bear was not really real and failing (everytime we came near to the truth
she held this expression on her face as if we had just told her candy was not
really good for you and chocolate was not a food group on its own, it was that
bad!), we decided to just tell her that he was on vacation and we would see his
relatives instead. This made her happy enough. So as all the times before we
had spotted this ridiculously long line of cars on the side of the road and so
out we jumped cameras in hand rushing to who knows where. People stopped us
asking what we were going to see and we very wisely answered, “To see that
animal over there,” waving our fingers in every direction. The crowd on the top
of the hill was ten feet deep so we wiggled our way through curious about what
exactly we would find on the other side. And there was Yogi Bears little niece
ambling along the mountainside with a throng of tourist following her like the paparazzi.
The very brave or not so wise (depends on how you view this) Kevin and Carmen
rushed up to take close ups of the bear. They were so close that when little
Yogi’s niece had a tiny sneeze they could feel her blow them away. Kate and I,
knowing that our cameras contained a wonderful zoom function opted to stay very
far behind. Then the unexpected happened, the bear turned around and started
walking towards the people! Kate and I who were 500 000 feet behind the crowd
turned tail and quickly sprinted to the opposite side of the road, while Kevin
and Carmen moved closer. At that moment if something had happened I was already
planning what I would write in their obituaries, “Friends who had temporarily
lost use of their brain failed to regain their sanity when they made friends
with a bear. They are now living with the spirits of the long departed, and I
hope they never regain their sanity because I just know Kevin will be kicking
himself that Shana and Kate turned out to be smarter.” They did manage to
safely displace themselves from Yogi’s niece and we ended up with some really
great pictures in the process.
So I got to see some really unique creatures on this
vacation and see the wild side come out in my friends. To all the places I have
been to so far, I really did enjoy Yellowstone. It was a place of which I knew
nothing so I was like those tourist we all get annoyed of, it was a really
invigorating experience to be like that. I’m already booking my next trip there;
I hope I will spot some of you with your fancy gadgets popping out of cars on
the side of the road when I stop by next time.
Safe travels!
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